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To: SoCooLBob@Yahoo.Com
From: (Courtney)
Subject: sexes

Below is the result of your feedback form. It was submitted by Courtney (

mycomments: For our 10th grade English class, we have to do an argumentitive research paper on sexual harassment, our opinions of the laws, and how they make us feel as men and women. I think that people cry wolf. Yes there is sexual harassment out there, but a man touching my shoulder should not constitute a law suite. It personally makes me feel weaker as a young woman because I feel that there now has to be laws to protect me from men. Yes, i understand that there are people out there that do not feel comfortable with someone making any physical contact with them, but then you need to stand up and tell that person how you feel, people can not read minds.

Perhaps the FIRST CLUE is yo'er description of the assignment. Argumentative paper ... The number one rule of human relations, as promoted by Dale Carnegie & Associates, is:

Don't Criticize, Condemn or Complain
If our dialogue and our actions continues to promote the notion of Me against YOU then conflict will continue, including this one that relates to a legal authority attempting to enforce LAWS against sexual harassment.

The number one problem, in my opinion, with this approach is the me against you part. The second problem is that the law attempts to define and regulate MY BEHAVIOR based on Your Opinion of it. The same action may lead to different results depending on what the other party thinks. In dealing with people who support this approach, it is rather clear that they value their own opinion above mine .. and YOURS.

What I am trying to say is that there has to be some happy medium. We have gone from one end of the spectrum with women not being able to get jobs with out sleeping with the boss, to where by school policy, I can not look at one of my guy friends for more than 5 seconds.

No question that there is some happy medium. Define the goal. What is the purpose of this class of legislation and law? To bring us together ? To penalize someone else's opinion of what you do ? Which of these goals is the higher ?

How 'bout a policy which promotes togetherness by FORCING the parties to come together to share their opinions with an unbiased referee who's experience and background lend to their ability to mediate and reconcile ? Lawyer's ? I don't think so.

How about some interactive conversation between boys and girls ? Consult with a large enough group and one might find how truly different many people's "opinions" are.

Good luck on yo'er report. Hopefully it will contribute to the enlightenment of the entire group.

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